The other night I dreamt I was at the base of a beautiful cascading waterfall. The waterfall that Steve and I ventured to in the Olympic Peninsula just a few weeks prior. It was in a beautiful lush area with large evergreen trees draped with hanging moss. I can almost smell the sweetness in the air as I write! In my dream I was standing in the water as it flowed around my feet. Not a strong current, just gentle constant water cascading around me.
The dream was so vibrant in my mind when I awoke that I starting thinking about water, how it continues to flow regardless of the obstacles. How when in a stream you are surrounded by new, fresh water each second. It continues to move so you are never touched by the same water twice. A pretty magical experience when you think about it. But water is both peaceful and powerful.
A few years back we went on an adventure exploring the Appalachian Trail on day hikes and a white-watering rafting trip. They give you safety instructions before the rafting trip and send you on your way. On a particular tough part of the river a guide joined us on the raft to help navigate. As soon as we were out of the rough spot he bounced out – and since I was on the same back part of the raft, I was ejected by his bouncing movement!
My first thought as I was going through the rapids and rocks ON MY OWN was to try and find something to hold onto. This, of course was the opposite of what the safety briefing stated. But, I guess it is human instinct. I scampered to get hold of a rock, but smashed my hip bone on a boulder as I did. Seeing that this was getting me nowhere, I was then reminded of the safety instructions – bob on your butt until you find calm water. So I bobbed, for what seemed like forever until I reunited with the raft in calmer waters. Whew, what an experience!
Like I said, water is both peaceful and powerful! I have experienced both in my life – the calm babbling brooks and the turbulent rivers. And all that is in between…the beauty of a still lake and the smell of lily pads. The magic of sea life in the Puget Sound – the friendly sea lion I met last year, the beautiful star fish we recently found on water’s edge.
The starfish was partly hidden by seaweed, but the waves exposed it as the seaweed swayed in rhythm of the ocean.
We enjoyed the majesty of orca and humpback whales in Alaska, and of course the enchanted puffins! I relish sensing the dewy, wet grass on my bare feet, and raindrops falling on my face. And nothing soothes me more than time on my kayak. Sometimes I think I am part mermaid since I feel at home and at peace near water.
So, back to that dream of the water cascading around me. The next morning I learned the results of my CT scan. The cancer is back (small nodule) and after meeting with my GYN oncologist we have a new plan. It is always reassuring when she doesn’t get too excited. I will stay on the current meds, get a PET scan and onto a new clinical trial that she is opening up early Fall.
Luckily, I have had time to stave off the panic of holding onto the rock, clutching for safety from the turbulent waters. Instead I will be bobbing down the rapids surrounded by new, fresh water flowing around me until I reach a calm patch in my journey.
In rivers, the water that you touch is the last of what has passed and the first of that which comes; so with present time.”― Leonardo da Vinci
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